In the US, there will be nearly two millions marriages in 2021.

Not all engagements end in marriage. Even though couples may feel positive and confident when they get engaged, there are many problems that can arise.

Some broken engagements can also lead to serious disagreements. It can be hard to resolve conflicts during this period, especially if emotions are high.

Let’s discuss how to effectively resolve disputes and the consequences of a broken agreement.

Causes of broken engagements

Doubt is common when it comes to marriage, which is an important milestone in most people’s lives. If you don’t feel ready for marriage, you can call off your engagement.

Relationships and engagements end for many reasons. Red flags are often not visible until specific situations or issues arise. Here are some of the most common reasons for broken engagements.

Infidelity

Infidelity can be defined as the act of being unfaithful towards a partner. Infidelity is most commonly associated with physical cheating such as kissing another person or having a sexual relationship. Many people consider emotional infidelity to be cheating.

Discussing boundaries early on in a relationship is important. When your partner is unfaithful, you can often end the relationship and break the engagement if they are unfaithful.

Financial issues

Finances are often the cause of arguments between partners. Recent research has shown that 47% of couples fight over money. These disagreements may signal the end of an engagement or relationship.

Some couples may have different financial habits or one partner may earn more than the other. Some couples who are engaged may have different views about how much money they want to spend on the wedding. Some unmarried couples can find a solution to these problems, but others cannot.

Money is important in building and maintaining a relationship. People with very different values or attitudes about money may decide to cancel their wedding.

Family dynamics

Marriage often involves dealing with the partner’s family. Some families accept and welcome their child’s partner. Some families are more open than others and some may even be hostile to their child’s chosen partner.

Arguments with family members can have a significant impact on the relationship between couples. This is especially true if your partner is very close to the family. Often, they may feel torn by their relationship with family and their partner.

If the family conflict becomes unbearable, and negatively affects your mental health, you may want to call off the engagement.

Different values and goals

Marriage is a commitment that lasts a lifetime. It works best when both partners have similar goals and values. Some people are unwilling to compromise on their core values. These include religion, cultural practices and political beliefs.

It is the same with one’s goals in life. One partner may want children and the other might not. The one partner may want to move and travel a lot while the other might not.

The life philosophy of each partner could be in conflict, making marriages difficult or impossible. Some couples may find a compromise or work around these issues. Breaking the engagement may be best when marrying someone requires you to give up a fundamental part of your identity.

Communication problems

Communication and understanding are essential for a lasting marriage. Both partners must be able communicate their needs, wants and problems to each other without arguing or being hostile. They must build a strong emotional connection to allow them to communicate openly and tackle problems effectively together.

Communication problems before or after the engagement may be enough to cause a relationship to break up. Be on the lookout for signs of verbal or emotional abuse. These are serious threats to healthy relationships.

Communication strategies for dealing with broken engagements

When you break an engagement or end your relationship, it is usually accompanied by strong emotions. If you need to resolve a few disagreements with your ex-fiance, respectful communication will be essential.

Let’s talk about some effective communication techniques you and your former partner can use to communicate with each other when the relationship has ended.

Active listening

This skill requires that you listen to the words of another person, as well as their meaning and intention. This means that you must be fully present during the conversation, and try to understand what the other person is saying.

Active listening can reduce conflict when addressing disputes arising from a breach of engagement. Active listening is about trying to understand, not just to respond.

Collaborative problem-solving

Collaborative problem solving is often used in educational or workplace settings. This strategy is also useful for settling practical issues after a project ends.

The name implies that both parties must work together to solve the problem. You and your partner should be objective, and work together to resolve unresolved issues.

Avoiding criticism and blame

It’s understandable that speaking with your ex-fiance can bring up negative emotions, especially if he or she did something cruel.

It’s better to avoid blaming and criticizing each other excessively when trying to resolve practical disputes. It is not productive to blame and criticize each other, especially when you are trying to resolve legal or practical issues.

You can ask a third-party to mediate if you and your ex are having trouble communicating. A mediator can sometimes help to improve communication and facilitate conflict resolution.

Guidelines for settling disputes over broken engagements

The end of a relationship is one of the most difficult things to do when breaking an engagement. Other issues also need to addressed.

Below, we’ll explore the emotional, legal, and practical aspects of a broken relationship.

Legal Considerations

Legal issues are usually present in long-term relationships and engagements, particularly. Long-term partners often have children, money, real estate and investments together.

Both parties will need to discuss the legal issues involved in ending the engagement or relationship.

• You may need to cancel a prenuptial agreement if you and your partner have signed it after you got engaged.
• If your state recognizes a common-law marriage, the division of assets is determined by that. Your joint assets will then be treated as marital property if your state recognizes common-law marriage.
• Child custody. The courts will handle the case as if it were a divorce with children. The courts will decide custody arrangements according to the best interest of the child.
• You’ll need an attorney if you or your former partner decide to file for a lawsuit. You should not speak with your ex without first consulting your lawyer. If you decide to sue, you can use Google Sheets as a tool for electronic discovery.

Consult an attorney if you are involved in a legal dispute after your engagement has ended. Consider using legal transcription services in order to record all the relevant information.

Practical Considerations

Practical issues will be involved in breaking your engagement. These issues are equally important, even if they may not seem as grave as legal concerns.

After ending your engagement, you may need to consider some practical issues.

• Returning personal items and gifts. It is legal to keep your ex’s gift, even the engagement ring. Discussing it with your former partner can help maintain a civil relationship.
• You may not be able to get your money back from vendors if you stop planning. Your vendors may not refund your money. Tell your family, guests, and friends that the wedding has been cancelled.

Emotional considerations

It is common for a broken engagement to signal the end of a romantic relationship, and this will have emotional consequences. During this time, it’s vital to take care of your mental and emotional health.

• Allow yourself to grieve the end of your relationship. You should allow yourself to experience your feelings and remember that you have a future beyond your relationship.
• Accepting your anger and resentment. You can channel your feelings through creative or physical activities. Finding things or activities that help you stay mindful and present is also essential. Consider seeking legal counsel and taking legal action if your anger is a result of any abuse or criminal acts.
  
• It’s important to build a network of support so you don’t go through the difficult time alone. You can better manage your emotions by spending time with loved ones, and sharing your burdens. You can get practical help from your loved ones.
• Speak to a professional. You can learn tools and exercises that you can use in your everyday life.

Find resolutions after a broken engagement

It can be difficult to resolve and settle disputes, especially if they involve the personal aspects of a broken relationship. Directness and respect are key to helping both parties come up with mutually beneficial decisions. Finding a legal team with experience that can help you find solutions, or who can direct you to professionals in a position of achieving results will be a great asset.